accelerate | ( ENTRANCEWAY INBOX )

[ there's a reason why barry had never spoken of his earth-2 counterpart: barry simply doesn't speak of himself. he may believe he'd earned those science award trophies, but he'd hardly bragged. attention was fine, especially if it was from the right people, but barry still shies away from the spotlight if he doesn't think himself deserving. ]

[ speaking of earth-2 barry simply wasn't on his agenda. he was someone barry wished he could be. ]

I don't know, I was just me.

He was a CSI. Wore glasses. Dressed ... kind of cool? He had cool shoes, no wonder Iris liked him.

He was kind of bumbling and ... insecure. Joe didn't like him at all. It's like I said, he thought he was selfish, because you — Iris had to become a cop to pay his tuition. But she was a damn good one. And Joe ... Honestly, you need to get your dad to sing. He's really, really, really good.

But that Barry was ... I don't know. We — They lived in Joe's house. Our Joe's house, I don't know if that was his house there, because I didn't get to stick around long enough to find out. But we lived there. And my mom was going on a cruise with dad, and Cisco, Caitlin, and Ronnie were metas. Barry just … He kind of just fits in there.

He was also a loser for Dr Harrison Wells. I guess that's going to be a universal thing. 😝

[ she tries to picture barry wearing glasses, and it makes her smile.

she tries to picture her dad disliking barry, and she finds that she can't, not even using every ounce of her imagination. joe west loves barry with everything he's got and then some. joe needs barry, in a different way than iris needs barry. anything else is unthinkable to her. wrong. ]

If E-2 Iris was anything like me, I doubt she only became a cop because she had to do it. [ no one really makes iris west do anything she doesn't want to do. not even herself. ] I think he'd sing to me when I was younger.

[ but she was much too young to remember those lullabies on her own. every song was for her, though. ]

The rest sounds kind of nice, though. [ his parents going on a cruise, dorky barry with his little bow ties and cool shoes. but then, joe didn't like barry. caitlin and cisco weren't really caitlin and cisco. it seems like no matter where they are, they can't have it all. ]

Speaking of Dr. Wells ... do you think he'll ever step out from his crab shell?

No.

That's his home. A Wells without the crabbiness? I think I'd be afraid. I don't ever want to see him smile. Don't crabs die if they leave their shells? Or become the leader of an orchestra and the advisor to King Triton.

[ that's a lie; barry would like to see him smile in jesse's direction, knowing she's safe and sound. but he's not allowed to tell wells that, and so he remains linefaced and grouchy. ]

But he did. Joe. E-2 Joe would dedicate each song to you that he sang at Jitters. He loved you a lot. It sucked knowing he didn't like me, but … knowing that you had him and he had you, it didn't really bother me.

Some things are fixed points, you know?

[ her smile deepens, and ridiculous though it may be, her eyes sting lightly. she is grateful for caitlin and the others, but she misses joe. she, joe, barry, and now even wally, they're a unit in their own way. the longer they are here, the more she feels their absence. iris has been angry at joe west more than once, has certainly given him the silent treatment more than once, but she is acutely aware that everything he's ever done, wrong or right, has been because he loves her.

it takes a while, then, to answer barry. ]

I know. It's how we always find our way home.

[ eventually. one way or another. ]

[ barry wonders if she's thinking what he's thinking. is she thinking of how he's begun to realise and even acknowledge that she's a fixed point for him? regardless of what he does, of who he becomes, of how the world shapes him, he always ends up orbiting iris like she's the sun and he's the planets, or she's simply the blanket of night sky his stars are stitched to. ]

[ the speed force had sucked him in, and though he felt compelled to leap toward cisco to be brought home, his friend hadn't appeared as an apparition of the force. he hadn't spoken to him. he'd come too early, too eagerly, and said the wrong things that barry didn't need to hear. but iris had come at the right time, had said the right things, had made him feel like he'd done the right thing, and had reached out to fill in the portions of him that were missing so he could feel whole again. ]

[ the news article, earth-2, the speed force … barry's taken too long to begin combing through the evidence that's been presented to him, but he's come quickly to a conclusion he can't quite pull apart and say is anything but the undeniable truth. ]

Or with an iPhone app.

[ he has to break the tension, either that or the timeline. and he doesn't want to think about that; what he thinks about is the positive: iris is a fixed point. every time he ends up walking too far into the forest of his own grief and sadness, he thinks of her being here and how that makes him feel good for the first time in a very long time. ]

Hopefully that string theory strings everything together for you better … ?

[ for once, it's not a tension that is shared.

where barry is a maelstrom of emotions and contradictions, iris feels calm and steady. she's spoken a truth, what feels like a truth to her, and she doesn't regret it. she has always considered herself someone he can come home to, and that is true whatever they are, whatever they end up being. she just worries about what he may do when he thinks he doesn't have anything to come home to. sometimes the reminders help. ]

Much better. I am now fully equipped to continue my conversation with Tracer.

Thanks, Barry.😌

[ by which she means, she understood at least fifty percent of it. that's something, right? ]

Anytime, Iris. 😉

You do know the next time there's some big greeky sciency thing, you are totally coming as my date, right? You owe me for this. It was in the small print of my messages, jsyk.

[ barry remembers the first time he met dr stein. the train ride had been one to remember, and the last time he ever felt like a bumbling fool who didn't leave damage in his wake. he remembers how he'd fumbled over telling him of iris, of how he was attending the particle accelerator reveal with his girl friend, who wasn't his girlfriend, but was his friend who was a girl. and he wanted her to be his girlfriend. ]

[ the day the particle accelerator was set to be switched on was the best day of his life. spending it with iris over something he enjoyed immensely, wanting to share that interest with her — he hadn't known it'd be the day that would change his life forever. ]

[ no one can blame him for wanting to relive something like that with her. ]

[ g r o a n. ]

Exactly how much science will be involved?

[ teasing! she's teasing. iris doth protest too much. before that fateful day of the particle accelerator explosion, there was no date iris wouldn't cancel and no plans she wouldn't push aside if it meant accompanying barry on an adventure. bonus points if it involved a lifelong dream of his.

that much hasn't changed. ]

I'm just wondering if some concessions will be made.

[ barry isn't so sure what he'd even drag iris along to, but he's certain if he wanted to open every door in a hallway and keep it open to see what pops out of it, if anything does at all, she'd do it with him. something stupid, something sciency, something investigative-like. ]

[ as much as he likes science, barry feels like he's had too much of it to last a good lifetime. not that iris needs to know. sometimes he thinks that confession may upset her more than amuse her. ]

What kind of concessions are you thinking?

So I know how much science needs to be involved. You know how intense this planning is.

And here I thought you'd be recruiting me into helping you find the caterpillar.

[ iris, don't give the man ideas.

... then again, she wouldn't be entirely opposed. they strive for the same goal, as a scientist and as a reporter, but their means can differ. he once reminded her of that. iris purses her lips, allowing a moment or two of suspense before she answers. ]

I get to pick what we eat, and you've got yourself a deal.

Ughhhhhhh.

[ it's not the worst deal in the world. in fact, she could've said he's never to ask her to tea time, he's to stop looking for the mad hatter, he has to be honest with her, he can't fuck up the timelines. ]

Is this going to last for a week? A day? A month? You need to tell me ALL THE DETAILS of this deal, Iris West.

I can't sign unless I know. I'm not easy. And I'm starting to get real hungry so this is an EMERGENCY. 911.

[ well, then.

iris had been talking about choosing dinner for that one day they're off doing something science-y together. here barry is assuming it will last longer than that. she doesn't correct his assumption. she's wondering how long she can actually get away with it. ]

It's hardly an emergency when you're ALWAYS hungry.

A week.

Take it or leave it.

This is DIFFERENT.

It's the type of hunger that turns people INSIDE OUT and UPSIDE DOWN.

It's the John McClane of hunger, and I think it's going to last for two long painfully hungry weeks instead of one.

[ see barry allen: he's watched ocean's eleven enough to have learned nothing at all on how to gamble, though he's pretty sure he could pull off robbing a casino now. but he sure does know how to raise the stakes dramatically. ]

there's a type of hunger that does that?

[ iris would love to know how your mind works sometimes, bartholomew. don't think she hasn't noticed that he's being terrible at this gambling thing. she could continue upping the stakes while barry pitifully attempts to meet her halfway, or— ]

Race you to the dining room.

[ she's sort of cheating since she'd already been moving toward it when they began talking about food. she is, in fact, already stepping inside of it right about ....

....

....

now. ]

Edited 2016-08-17 23:23 (UTC)

[ she'll find barry's already there. feet propped up on the table in a demonstration of very poor manners that'd inspire mr higgins into a fit, he's stuffing his face with food. tipping his head back, he's feeding himself grapes. all that's missing is a gigantic palm fanning him. ]

[ when he opens his mouth, nothing sensible comes out. what he's meant to say: you're late. what it ends up sounding like: sjdkfls. but he does manage to clearly say: ] Iris!

[ and waves his hand before he flicks his wrist and a grape flies into the air, forms a smooth arc, and lands in his mouth. ]

[ of course, barry almost falls out of his chair trying to catch it. ]

[ iris snorts, a fondness to the sound, as always.

if they were twelve, she'd all but point and laugh. as it is, she plops down on the chair beside him, grabs one of those luscious grapes, tosses it high, high into the air, and catches it like a boss. then she leans back satisfied. ]

Barry!

[ en garde. ]

[ in a high-pitched and excited voice, he mocks her kindly, ] Iris!

[ he rests his feet on the ground and grabs a muffin quite quickly, shoving that in his mouth with the speed of the flash. he taps the table in a beckoning of her before he even manages to chew and swallow. ]

[ and he throws a random grape at her. whether or not his aim is accurate, or the arc of the grape goes anywhere near her — it's up to iris to decide if she's skilled enough to try and catch it, or if barry allen simply sucks at spontaneously throwing grapes. ]

Hey.

[ i rolled the dice for this btw. iris caught it well enough, narrowly missing her mark. once the sneaky grape has made its way into her palm, she tosses it into the air too, and lets it sink into her mouth, head tipped back. victorious and smug, she lets herself fall back on her chair again. ]

Have you eaten actual food since we got here, or have you been subsisting on cupcakes and muffins alone?

[ he rambles on at a flash-like pace, ] I had a pizza and pasta and a burger — You know they don't have Belly Burgers here? — and something that was really spicy, and I had this whole buffet the other night …

[ barry finishes his muffin, then grabs the nearest glass and drains it. he isn't necessarily an uncontrollable eater. he paces himself quite well at home, but there's something about wonderland that makes him as excitable as a boy — except one who's hooked to the speed force and its abundant amount of restless energy. ]

[ finally settling into his chair, he gives her a sheepish shrug. ]

Sometimes I get bored. And it's a good distraction.

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