accelerate | ( ENTRANCEWAY INBOX )

[ barry has to think about it. does he give eobard thawne a chance to not go back in time and alter what was supposed to be his life? the newspaper from 2024 doesn't quite make much sense on its own. without thawne's provided context, barry doesn't know if it's him or the one who originally existed before thawne had wiped him from the timeline by altering one moment in his life that turned out to be so pivotal in shaping him. ]

[ he doesn't know if he'd even give thawne that chance. ]

[ it sounds like to barry it was meant to happen. lewis snart was meant to be given that jewel by his son, and end up thrown into a cell for it. maybe that's snart's revenge, in some way. ]

[ again, his response is just a little slow, noticeable enough to anyone who knows barry's rapid fire responses are him taking his time in reading a message. ]

Zoom killed my dad.

You want to know what I'm holding back? It's that.

[ half of what he's holding back. ]

[Leonard had meant to give his father the jewel so he'd not get caught stealing it. So he'd not end up in jail and become the monster he grew up with, the monster that hurt his sister. He gave him the jewel to save them all. But it had changed nothing.]

Condolences.

So that made you change the timeline? Wanting both your parents alive.

[All of what he's holding back? It's an educated guess still, but he feels well educated. A combination of getting information from multiple sources and being who he is. Rhymes with smart for a reason.]

You're risking a lot. Without anyone's consent.

I haven't changed the timeline.

[ yet. ]

[ henry being killed had been the straw that broke the camel's back. henry dying by a speedster in that living room had been what had propelled barry into believing he could achieve the impossible. when thawne had given him the opportunity to go back in time and save nora, he'd come to the conclusion he was happy. but he wasn't content to have people keep dying because they were tied to him. ]

[ but he's beginning to wonder if bliss and freedom from that particular poltergeist will ever be found if he changes the timeline and puts it back in place. ]

You asked me what I was holding back, you've got it. Wells said not to give out spoilers like they're candy.

[ and barry's honestly not a sharer when it comes to this. ]

Fair enough. That's worth running from.

Condolences, as I've said before.

[From what he gathers, dying father might be a different emotional deal for Barry than it has been for him.]

Wells, Snow, West. They're from before then?

Wells and Caitlin are behind. Iris remembers what I remember.

[ but, of course, not what he remembers doing. the flash may be poor at keeping his identity a secret when there's a few people in the flash headquarters, but barry allen's always been skilled at keeping his cards close to his chest. ]

Wells has been afraid of disrupting the timeline. But the timeline can't be altered here.

So you're keeping each other in the dark? Sounds reasonable.

[Or really dumb, but can he really judge? On the other hand, him and Raymond are on the same page now. As much as they could ever be on the same page, given vastly different reading styles.]

Doesn't look like we can really alter anything back home here.

[ a part of him wants to stick up for wells' argument, but he lets it be. there's both positives and negatives to keeping someone in the dark. he's experienced it all first hand with iris and dad and all of his friends; sometimes it was best to protect them from how dangerous the world had become, and most of the time, it was stupid to keep himself without his proper armour. if he had iris on his team earlier, perhaps he would've had someone watching his back when he'd left it bare. ]

[ lesson learnt. except now it's made him walk as though there's bits of the timelines on the floor instead of eggshells. ]

I would've noticed if they were gone from home. It's weird. Wonderland doesn't work like Earth-2 did, or how time travel does. You'd think you'd know something happened. Your memory should change. Caitlin and Wells never disappeared randomly, or else I'd know.

I'm dead, Barry. This place doesn't follow any kind of logic. No rules, time travel or otherwise, at least none that I can figure out.

[And he is good at figuring things out. He is good at plotting and seeing through plots. But this? More like someone has lost the plot.]

There's always the possibility you're not.

[ barry allen, the believer in the impossible, and a speedster with a few tricks up his sleeve. he may only know ray to be in snart's group of atm robbers, but he doesn't doubt if he has a team that can travel through space and time that they'd sit idle while a team mate dies. ]

[ barry wouldn't. ]

You never know, your friends might actually save you.

No. I planned for it. They can't, they couldn't, they won't, they haven't.

I'd made up my mind. Discuss it with Raymond if you want to, he's upset at me for mourning wrong.

[Such a Ray thing to feel. But whatever the case, that isn't his point here.]

I just meant, this place doesn't seem to interfere with our timelines or even the time stream of our universe.

[ what barry doesn't want to accept: none of this is real. hadn't that been the entire point to the book? alice fell asleep, and dreamed a dream of the impossible. it's much like how barry often falls asleep and wakes up in his bed, waddles downstairs, and finds mom and dad sitting at the kitchen table. that's a dream he's had since he was eleven years old, and he still has it at twenty-six. ]

Or nothing's been powerful enough to puncture it yet.

[ or fast enough. ]

Gonna outrun reality again, Scarlet?

[ when snart says scarlet this time, he's not quite sure if it's meant as a term of endearment. barry allen always runs away from reality; it's the only way he's found he copes. ]

I'm just going to run out of the rabbit hole, Snart. You're welcome to join me.

What are you planning?

[ what's he planning? to do exactly what snart accused him of doing, and thus disappointing his coolest fan. ]

A Wonderland break.

Thinking of calling it Barry's 11.

Interesting thought.

Have you considered anything with that idea that doesn't amount to you doing something really, really fast? What's the plan?

Run really, really, really fast.

Run, Barry, run.

Maybe do some research before breaking the world.

[ when the speed force had said that, it hadn't been unsettling. perhaps it'd been because it was the very thing pushing him forward, giving him the confidence to do what he thought was impossible. snart is nothing like thawne, but he has a feeling he's not being entirely encouraging as the speed force had been. ]

[ it's not a motto he wants to be hearing, not when his head's still stuck in that living room and imagining himself saving nora allen from eobard thawne. ]

Wonderland can't be broken. That's what we tell everyone, and that's what we believe.

It literally patches itself up. All the time. Every time.

It's a cage. But every cage has a weak spot. You should know this. You're break into heavily secured buildings all the time. You're breaking timelines yourself, and they're supposed to be untouchable.

[More sarcastic than encouraging, but not secretly a speed and Barry-obsessed fanboy either, so it could be worse.]

I never broke a timeline, not really. Just blew up some time masters and their means of manipulation.

But if I had to make a guess? Mirror-side.

I'm going to try and learn everything I can, and get over there. Get us out of here.

[ and break a world in the meantime, perhaps. it's just another tuesday, isn't it? but barry has to believe in the impossible, and he has to channel that desperate energy somewhere. ]

BTW, I've never broken a timeline. I don't think they snap so easily.

Down the rabbit hole, far as I know. I want to hop over myself some time. Though before you try to break this world, maybe you should see what people really want.

[As far as he knows - and given he exploded that is very conclusive - he is very much done for. But in spite of having had to plan for dying, he likes living. Even in a place as bizarre as this.]

Making decisions for everyone else, just for what you think is the best? Kinda selfish.

[ his hackles are up, and he knows exactly why. what snart's telling him is what he's been running away from in his own thoughts. he knows what he wants to do is selfish. he knows that he hadn't asked what his friends thought he should do, even though he sometimes writes it off as already having asked them over a year ago. he knows that it's not cool, but it's all he can think to do. ]

[ there'd been a question some of the police officers had asked him once at ccpd. would you save a sibling or save a group of strangers? barry knows he'd save that one person in order to protect the world. ]

There are people here trying to find a way out. Maybe I can help.

Alice didn't help the Mad Hatter when he was stuck at that table waiting for tea-time because he didn't want her help. I can be like Alice. I'm sure there's a door out there waiting for us to find it.

Right.

What makes someone a hero, Barry?

[This being in person, Leonard would know for a fact that he'd hit on a nerve, but even so he gets an inkling of it, even if all he's doing is texting from his room.

Also, he's not calling him Alice, no weird vibes needed.]

Someone who's willing to sacrifice for the greater good.

[ hasn't he sacrificed enough? it's a thought that's come to him many times over, and only on the rare occasion has he let it settle in his bones and make him angry. it'd been what had propelled him to go to that night in 2000 to try and rescue mom, and he knows that anger had ebbed away so quickly once he realised why he was there. he'd gone there to provide her comfort and to make sure she died in peace, instead of afraid and alone in the cold. ]

[ she'd always protected him from the dark, and it was his turn to repay the favour. ]

[ but it's a thought he's had since dad died, and barry knows it's not the right question to ask. ]

But I'm sure you'd disagree.

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