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[ tracer doesn't seem too bad. she's not as grouchy as wells, not as secretive and whispery as thawne. in fact, she reminds him of jesse, warm and completely endearing. if that isn't a good sign to barry, then he doesn't know what is. that anxiety he often feels whenever such terms are tossed around to explain others withers. ]

[ idg string theory but here we go: ]

I've always wanted to go spelunking in a cave ... Maybe we could find some strings there?

But not the point.

Well, string theory tries to explain everything. You know how sometimes I kind of get really obsessive over Beyonce so I google her and know everything about her, from her early life and how she got her start, Destiny's Child's revolving bandmates, the drama, how they broke up, the meaning of their songs, the production of their songs, the people involved ... and even the vocal analysis of her voice? It's kind of like that.

String theory would probably help us explain Wonderland and all the different earths but … I guess, in Iris Talk, it's like how your clothes are made of threads, or strings. It unites everything. It's meant to bring two scientific theories together to make sense of the universe. Quantum physics and gravity.

What Tracer's saying is that, to her, I guess time hopping and world hopping are the same, or they're linked. It's probably similar to how I can go to Earth-2 and I can go to the past. We don't really view it the same since Earth-2 is a completely different world to ours, right? Like whatever I do in the past won't affect that life there, so we kind of think it's not connected. But string theory would say that it is.

If ... I went back in time and ... instead of dating Becky Cooper, I didn't date anyone at all, that would affect the timeline, right? String theory's saying that Earth-2 would be affected, too. Maybe that Barry didn't date Becky Cooper, but if he dated someone else in school, maybe that would be different because of me going back and changing that one little thing. It's a ripple effect because it's connected via a string.

Or ... Earth-2 Iris became a cop because Joe said no to you, so your decision not to be a cop caused a ripple effect that propelled Iris from E-2 to be a cop. Like maybe the string means that both Irises can't be the same, so one goes off to be a future winner of the Pulitzer Prize, and the other becomes the Director of CCPD. You're connected by a string. E-1 and E-2 can't be the same, maybe because that's the rule of the string tying E1 Iris and E2 Iris together.

Does that make sense?

[ see, string theory helping them explain wonderland is precisely why iris wants to know more about it. she's been in full reporter mode since she arrived, but the more she unravels these threads, the less clear it all becomes. too many loose ends. too many open-ended questions. and too many things that don't make sense no matter how hard she tries. of course, she'd also forgotten that asking barry to explain science means ... there is a lot of science involved.

she is breaking her promise: her eyes totally glaze over. also, her priorities are rarely science.

sorry, bro. ]

You really think not dating Becky Cooper would have that much of an effect ?

[ spoiler: she really could not stand becky cooper. and she is just saying. ]

[ but okay, now the warm fuzzies: ] It makes sense. You really think I'll win a Pulitzer?

[ barry has to laugh. ]

[ he can imagine her saying becky cooper in that voice of hers. becky cooper. she hadn't been a big, radiating star in barry's night sky, but she'd been one that he'd tried to catch in his fumbling hands. even then, he'd wanted iris, but fear of upsetting their friendship and the life he wanted after school had kept him at bay and from her. sometimes barry wonders what would've happened if he had simply asked her back then. ]

Maybe?

I never asked on E-2.

[ is he stirring the pot? ]

[ just a little. ]

No, I don't think.

I know.

[ omg.

iris' dislike of becky was irrational, to be fair. to be even fairer, becky didn't like iris much either, but she likely had reasons not to. if people thought iris was unfair to linda when she first started dating barry, they did not see her with becky cooper. becky cooper. at the time, iris had convinced herself she was looking out for barry; that becky simply wasn't right for him. she somehow knew that to be true, deep in her gut, even if she did not know much of anything else. ]

So. E-1 and E-2 Barry can't be the same, unless they weren't tied together by a string. Since we're operating under the assumption they are, E-2 you wouldn't have dated Becky Cooper. Right? [ i.e., he clearly made smarter romantic choices. ]

Edited (phrasing this better shhh) 2016-08-12 05:16 (UTC)

[

]

Maybe she was your best friend instead.

[

]

[ in all seriousness, though, barry has thought about the similarities between earth-1 and earth-2, and he's been wondering why he hadn't known caitlin and cisco, or killer frost and reverb, but had known iris. killer frost hadn't seemed to recognise him as a former friend, and if she had, it'd been like she'd frozen that bit out of her. ]

But that's true. If E-2 Barry dated Becky, then she wouldn't have been his first girlfriend. It doesn't seem like a fixed point for him. Maybe she wasn't even in his life at all. From what I can remember, the CCPD and you and Joe were what mirrored our world. Everything and everyone else changed.

[ the fixed point for barry allen, though, is west. ]

[ S C R E A M.

ok, now that she's got that out of her system, her expression softens as they talk about E-2 in earnest. he isn't telling her something she doesn't already know, but it makes her smile all the same: compass points all lead to the same port of call. that's why it's home. ]

I know what my dad was like in E-2. And I know what I was like. But you never told me what you were like. [ they never had the chance to talk much about it, not when the shark in pants was tearing through the city.

yeah, a shark in pants. ]

[ there's a reason why barry had never spoken of his earth-2 counterpart: barry simply doesn't speak of himself. he may believe he'd earned those science award trophies, but he'd hardly bragged. attention was fine, especially if it was from the right people, but barry still shies away from the spotlight if he doesn't think himself deserving. ]

[ speaking of earth-2 barry simply wasn't on his agenda. he was someone barry wished he could be. ]

I don't know, I was just me.

He was a CSI. Wore glasses. Dressed ... kind of cool? He had cool shoes, no wonder Iris liked him.

He was kind of bumbling and ... insecure. Joe didn't like him at all. It's like I said, he thought he was selfish, because you — Iris had to become a cop to pay his tuition. But she was a damn good one. And Joe ... Honestly, you need to get your dad to sing. He's really, really, really good.

But that Barry was ... I don't know. We — They lived in Joe's house. Our Joe's house, I don't know if that was his house there, because I didn't get to stick around long enough to find out. But we lived there. And my mom was going on a cruise with dad, and Cisco, Caitlin, and Ronnie were metas. Barry just … He kind of just fits in there.

He was also a loser for Dr Harrison Wells. I guess that's going to be a universal thing. 😝

[ she tries to picture barry wearing glasses, and it makes her smile.

she tries to picture her dad disliking barry, and she finds that she can't, not even using every ounce of her imagination. joe west loves barry with everything he's got and then some. joe needs barry, in a different way than iris needs barry. anything else is unthinkable to her. wrong. ]

If E-2 Iris was anything like me, I doubt she only became a cop because she had to do it. [ no one really makes iris west do anything she doesn't want to do. not even herself. ] I think he'd sing to me when I was younger.

[ but she was much too young to remember those lullabies on her own. every song was for her, though. ]

The rest sounds kind of nice, though. [ his parents going on a cruise, dorky barry with his little bow ties and cool shoes. but then, joe didn't like barry. caitlin and cisco weren't really caitlin and cisco. it seems like no matter where they are, they can't have it all. ]

Speaking of Dr. Wells ... do you think he'll ever step out from his crab shell?

No.

That's his home. A Wells without the crabbiness? I think I'd be afraid. I don't ever want to see him smile. Don't crabs die if they leave their shells? Or become the leader of an orchestra and the advisor to King Triton.

[ that's a lie; barry would like to see him smile in jesse's direction, knowing she's safe and sound. but he's not allowed to tell wells that, and so he remains linefaced and grouchy. ]

But he did. Joe. E-2 Joe would dedicate each song to you that he sang at Jitters. He loved you a lot. It sucked knowing he didn't like me, but … knowing that you had him and he had you, it didn't really bother me.

Some things are fixed points, you know?

[ her smile deepens, and ridiculous though it may be, her eyes sting lightly. she is grateful for caitlin and the others, but she misses joe. she, joe, barry, and now even wally, they're a unit in their own way. the longer they are here, the more she feels their absence. iris has been angry at joe west more than once, has certainly given him the silent treatment more than once, but she is acutely aware that everything he's ever done, wrong or right, has been because he loves her.

it takes a while, then, to answer barry. ]

I know. It's how we always find our way home.

[ eventually. one way or another. ]

[ barry wonders if she's thinking what he's thinking. is she thinking of how he's begun to realise and even acknowledge that she's a fixed point for him? regardless of what he does, of who he becomes, of how the world shapes him, he always ends up orbiting iris like she's the sun and he's the planets, or she's simply the blanket of night sky his stars are stitched to. ]

[ the speed force had sucked him in, and though he felt compelled to leap toward cisco to be brought home, his friend hadn't appeared as an apparition of the force. he hadn't spoken to him. he'd come too early, too eagerly, and said the wrong things that barry didn't need to hear. but iris had come at the right time, had said the right things, had made him feel like he'd done the right thing, and had reached out to fill in the portions of him that were missing so he could feel whole again. ]

[ the news article, earth-2, the speed force … barry's taken too long to begin combing through the evidence that's been presented to him, but he's come quickly to a conclusion he can't quite pull apart and say is anything but the undeniable truth. ]

Or with an iPhone app.

[ he has to break the tension, either that or the timeline. and he doesn't want to think about that; what he thinks about is the positive: iris is a fixed point. every time he ends up walking too far into the forest of his own grief and sadness, he thinks of her being here and how that makes him feel good for the first time in a very long time. ]

Hopefully that string theory strings everything together for you better … ?

[ for once, it's not a tension that is shared.

where barry is a maelstrom of emotions and contradictions, iris feels calm and steady. she's spoken a truth, what feels like a truth to her, and she doesn't regret it. she has always considered herself someone he can come home to, and that is true whatever they are, whatever they end up being. she just worries about what he may do when he thinks he doesn't have anything to come home to. sometimes the reminders help. ]

Much better. I am now fully equipped to continue my conversation with Tracer.

Thanks, Barry.😌

[ by which she means, she understood at least fifty percent of it. that's something, right? ]

Anytime, Iris. 😉

You do know the next time there's some big greeky sciency thing, you are totally coming as my date, right? You owe me for this. It was in the small print of my messages, jsyk.

[ barry remembers the first time he met dr stein. the train ride had been one to remember, and the last time he ever felt like a bumbling fool who didn't leave damage in his wake. he remembers how he'd fumbled over telling him of iris, of how he was attending the particle accelerator reveal with his girl friend, who wasn't his girlfriend, but was his friend who was a girl. and he wanted her to be his girlfriend. ]

[ the day the particle accelerator was set to be switched on was the best day of his life. spending it with iris over something he enjoyed immensely, wanting to share that interest with her — he hadn't known it'd be the day that would change his life forever. ]

[ no one can blame him for wanting to relive something like that with her. ]

[ g r o a n. ]

Exactly how much science will be involved?

[ teasing! she's teasing. iris doth protest too much. before that fateful day of the particle accelerator explosion, there was no date iris wouldn't cancel and no plans she wouldn't push aside if it meant accompanying barry on an adventure. bonus points if it involved a lifelong dream of his.

that much hasn't changed. ]

I'm just wondering if some concessions will be made.

[ barry isn't so sure what he'd even drag iris along to, but he's certain if he wanted to open every door in a hallway and keep it open to see what pops out of it, if anything does at all, she'd do it with him. something stupid, something sciency, something investigative-like. ]

[ as much as he likes science, barry feels like he's had too much of it to last a good lifetime. not that iris needs to know. sometimes he thinks that confession may upset her more than amuse her. ]

What kind of concessions are you thinking?

So I know how much science needs to be involved. You know how intense this planning is.

And here I thought you'd be recruiting me into helping you find the caterpillar.

[ iris, don't give the man ideas.

... then again, she wouldn't be entirely opposed. they strive for the same goal, as a scientist and as a reporter, but their means can differ. he once reminded her of that. iris purses her lips, allowing a moment or two of suspense before she answers. ]

I get to pick what we eat, and you've got yourself a deal.

Ughhhhhhh.

[ it's not the worst deal in the world. in fact, she could've said he's never to ask her to tea time, he's to stop looking for the mad hatter, he has to be honest with her, he can't fuck up the timelines. ]

Is this going to last for a week? A day? A month? You need to tell me ALL THE DETAILS of this deal, Iris West.

I can't sign unless I know. I'm not easy. And I'm starting to get real hungry so this is an EMERGENCY. 911.

[ well, then.

iris had been talking about choosing dinner for that one day they're off doing something science-y together. here barry is assuming it will last longer than that. she doesn't correct his assumption. she's wondering how long she can actually get away with it. ]

It's hardly an emergency when you're ALWAYS hungry.

A week.

Take it or leave it.

This is DIFFERENT.

It's the type of hunger that turns people INSIDE OUT and UPSIDE DOWN.

It's the John McClane of hunger, and I think it's going to last for two long painfully hungry weeks instead of one.

[ see barry allen: he's watched ocean's eleven enough to have learned nothing at all on how to gamble, though he's pretty sure he could pull off robbing a casino now. but he sure does know how to raise the stakes dramatically. ]

there's a type of hunger that does that?

[ iris would love to know how your mind works sometimes, bartholomew. don't think she hasn't noticed that he's being terrible at this gambling thing. she could continue upping the stakes while barry pitifully attempts to meet her halfway, or— ]

Race you to the dining room.

[ she's sort of cheating since she'd already been moving toward it when they began talking about food. she is, in fact, already stepping inside of it right about ....

....

....

now. ]

Edited 2016-08-17 23:23 (UTC)

[ she'll find barry's already there. feet propped up on the table in a demonstration of very poor manners that'd inspire mr higgins into a fit, he's stuffing his face with food. tipping his head back, he's feeding himself grapes. all that's missing is a gigantic palm fanning him. ]

[ when he opens his mouth, nothing sensible comes out. what he's meant to say: you're late. what it ends up sounding like: sjdkfls. but he does manage to clearly say: ] Iris!

[ and waves his hand before he flicks his wrist and a grape flies into the air, forms a smooth arc, and lands in his mouth. ]

[ of course, barry almost falls out of his chair trying to catch it. ]

[ iris snorts, a fondness to the sound, as always.

if they were twelve, she'd all but point and laugh. as it is, she plops down on the chair beside him, grabs one of those luscious grapes, tosses it high, high into the air, and catches it like a boss. then she leans back satisfied. ]

Barry!

[ en garde. ]

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